12/21/06 Holiday Message

Last Saturday we had some professional pictures taken. It was great to see all the other families there with their boys and girls dressed up and I loved having my girl in a dress there as well. Just one of many firsts for us!

Helena continues to keep us busy. She is waving bye bye, blowing kisses, giving kisses, and still doing her clapping for anyone who cares to notice. After she had been home for about five days she began putting her hand to her ear when the phone rang.

We apologize that we will not be very active in gift exchanging this year. It is all we can manage to get back two weeks before Christmas and get through the mail, bills and laundry that have collected in addition to adjusting to and figuring out Ms. Busybody. (new nickname) I did have some cards printed but they may not be received until after Christmas given the obvious challenges as I would like to do more than simply mail the picture with greeting. Helena did have some good nights recently, but she does like waking up at 5 am for THE day!

Our extended families are far away so once again it will be just our immediate family for Christmas. I hope you all have safe travels this holiday season, do not get over-stressed and focus on the meaning of God's gift to us in sending Jesus for our salvation.

12/14/06 Pictures

The top picture is Jacob playing with her on the first morning home at 6 am.

The bottom picture is the first day we saw Helena at the orphanage in November. It was her first birthday and we put a party hat on her.

The picture to the right is taken on one of the days spent playing with her in the small room filled with pipes. I thought this was the cutest outfit the orphanage ever dressed her in as she was not all "bundled up" with the institutional booties.

Helena is keeping us up at nights but otherwise is pretty happy during the day. She is beginning to walk and she prefers the gymnastics routine in the kitchen (climbing under chairs) and climbing the stairs (with a chaperone) to playing with her toys in the family room. She has enjoyed meeting the neighbors, especially all the little girls, and is happy to perform all her tricks for them, clapping, waving, etc. Yesterday the phone rang, and she put her hand up to her ear. Yes, she has already talked on the phone, mostly to her daddy.

12/10/06 Back Home

On Friday, December 8th, we arrived back home to the states. Our flights and connection through Munich was fairly uneventful. As anticipated, Helena was pretty stimulated by the whole experience. We woke up at 2:30 am Moscow time on Friday morning and she woke up as well about 3 am, despite our attempt to wisk her to the airport unawares. Our flight was scheduled for 5:50 am and since it was only 3:30 am when we arrived, the luggage check-in area was not yet open. We waited for nearly an hour as people lined up for their check-in all around us. I walked around with Helena in the front carrier. She was wide awake and active. We were very tired (already!) Finally we were able to check-in. The attendant looked through the papers Mike presented and asked if we had a ticket for Helena. Mike explained the airline had informed him she could go as a lap baby on the short leg to Munich. They told him he needed to go back through security and buy her a ticket even as a lap baby. I was a bit ticked off at this point. We pushed the luggage aside for the attendant to hold and I continued to circle the area with her for the second hour as I waited. After another half hour, Mike showed up with the ticket. We got to the gate just in time to board the flight. Thank goodness we had arrived to the airport so early, because we might have missed our flight.

The trip to Munich was only 3 hours and we were served a nice breakfast. In Munich we had a five hour layover and spend some of the time in the red carpet lounge. We set up some luggage and chairs to keep Helena contained but she managed to sneak out and enjoyed crawling through all the tunnels under the arms of the chairs. It was very early in Munich and at first there were not many travelers in the lounge, but as time went on, more arrived. Helena cried a few times and I don’t think the some of the travelers were too fond of sharing their space with her. As we walked to the gate to catch our 11 something am connection to the states, Helena fell asleep – but for only 15 minutes! We boarded the plane and began our final nine hour trip home. Helena continued enjoying other travelers, peeking over the seats, looking over in the next aisle. We enjoyed keeping her from going flying onto the floor or bonking her head on the seat in front of her (she had her own seat). I looked longingly at the couple across from us who once represented us. They sat alone, reading books and watching the movie while their children, six and fourteen, sat in another row and independently entertained themselves! At times, Helena did seem tired and we took turns walking her around the airplane. Later in the flight I’d put on her butterfly shoes, so some of our rounds on the 777 included her walking (no racing) as we bent over holding her elbow. After crying for a while, she finally fell asleep for about 20 minutes. Sometime during the ride, she fell asleep for another few minutes in my arms (I didn’t dare move her this time) and in all she logged about 75 minutes total sleep time over the nearly 20 hour travel ordeal.

We arrived at Dulles a few minutes ahead of schedule and with the exhausted and sleeping Helena (who fell asleep as we touched the ground) went to get our luggage and go through customs and immigration. She woke up abruptly when the passport control officer scanned her passport. It didn’t take too much time to get through immigration and enter the main terminal of the airport and when we did, we were greeted by a wonderful group of friends holding signs, balloons and gifts and shouting words of greeting. It was wonderful and a bit overwhelming, given our stupor. Helena rose to the occasion and managed to crank out a few smiles. It was great greeting our friends and several other adopted children who had entered the country through the same hallways. Michael’s parents and our sons arrived a few minutes later. I clutched whichever one would let me (Jacob I think) and vowed never to let him go. They both seemed much larger than I recalled. My knee, which did pretty well overseas is now hurting, given that I refuse to stop picking up my boys. Jacob and I have a ritual of twelve hugs a day and I have alerted him that we have a lot of time to make up for. Our entourage took many pictures of our family re-united and soon dispersed to send us home.

We are back home as a family now and I truly feel that my family is complete and this is the way God intended it to be. On our first morning, I got up with Helena at 5 am and Jacob came down and joined us at 6. We spent some time together uniting the two siblings one on one. It’s great to see the tenderness Jacob exhibits towards his little sister and he is enjoying building pillow walls and tunnels for her to cruise and crawl through. Justin was engaged with “Nutcracker” performances most of the day, so his time with Helena was brief on Saturday.

I am a few days late posting this and it is now Thursday, December 14th. We are now pretty tired but adjusting and really enjoying Helena. It is like she has always been with us. The nights are a bit difficult but I'm sure it will take a while for her to re-set her schedule and for us all to adapt. Thank you so much for reading and for supporting us on this venture.

12/7/06 - Finally got online

Mike's turn again. Our friend Mark let us use his computer to make some posts - we posted three new ones in addition to this one. On the off chance that my parents read this post this morning (Thursday before 11 AM your time) you can give us a call at the Marriot Courtyard. Use the calling card and then look in the folder for a copy of our confirmation - it wil have the phone number on it. Put a 011 in front of the 7 and you should have no problem - everyone at the front desk speaks excellent English, though you might have to spell our name. We are 8 hours ahead, and after about 11 your time we willbe sleeping to prepare for an early wake up to make our 5 AM flight. By this time tomorrow, we should be in Munich waiting for our final leg home. See you soon!

12/6/06 Waiting and Visiting Red Square

This morning we greeted our cherished friend, Mark, who came into Moscow with his son, Max, and step-dad, Vincent. They were two days behind us in Perm, but had managed to get their passport done in a day. We were in waiting mode, we did not hear about our visa this morning and because the doctor at Max’s physical said that Max had to have his blood tests re-done, we were all free for most of the day. We ventured out to a baby store to get a stroller for Max (we had brought one with us for Helena) and to see the sights. The baby store was magnificent though very expensive. They had no truly inexpensive umbrella strollers and the prices started at 3500 rubles ($180). Mark asked me what lightweight stroller I’d choose. I was paralyzed at the idea of making the choice on the spot, but managed to point out a Chicco mustard colored model that had a weather protection bag for the child attached. Mark had already been addressed by a woman on the street for having some skin on Max’s calf exposed to the cold air, and since I didn’t see Mark taking me up on my offer to dress Max in Helena’s extra tights for the remaining two days, the stroller with the weather bag seemed to be a sound choice.

Once outfitted with Max in the stroller, more diapers, and more baby food we rolled over to Red Square and St. Basil’s cathedral. It was magnificent! St. Basil’s is much more impressive in person, it is so colorful! Apparently Ivan the Terrible blinded the architect who designed it, as he didn’t want anything as beautiful to ever be created again. In front of the Kremlin is Lenin’s tomb and we also managed to videotape a ceremony in front of the tomb of the unknown soldier on the other side of the Kremlin. Michael insisted I take all the pictures since I had my passport with me (his was with Helena’s paperwork) in the event one of us got arrested, at least I would have my passport to prove my identity. We took the babies in to eat at Sbarro (which faced the tomb of the unknown soldier we had just seen), where it was child friendly and the food was inexpensive. We then all rolled back to the hotel. We were sure we would be delayed a day and we were astonished to find a message on our service stating that Helena’s visa had been processed late in the morning and that we would be able to leave Friday morning!!!! Michael was overcome with emotion as he heard the message and then we all had a big cry. Moscow is beautiful, but we are ready to go home and due to circumstances surrounding Justin’s participation in Nutcracker on Saturday, we really wanted to come home on Friday and be reunited as a family and so we will!

For anyone who is planning on meeting us at the airport, you can call our home for final details through Mike’s parents. We are scheduled to arrive from Munich right around 3 pm, but it will likely be after 4 by the time we take the shuttle from the plane and go through immigration (for Helena) and customs. Also, at this moment in time we are limited in our ability to communicate by email or phone. If you are reading this, could someone arrange to videotape us re-uniting with our sons at the airport? I’m sure this would be valuable for Helena in years to come. Mo, I know you have a camcorder and you are planning on coming. Or, someone else, give our parents a call at home, there is a camcorder in the top of the hall closet. Please direct them on how to use it or ask them to hand it to someone else.

12/5/06 Embassy Day and “trying” to get Helena’s Visa

On Tuesday morning, Helena woke at 5 am and I used my cold as a legitimate excuse to stay in bed a while longer. Mike and his girl walked the halls of the hotel. Breakfast was not included in the room rate, and at $33 a person, we chose to pass and eat granola bars in the room. We also risked drinking the tap water since it cost $5 for a 1 litre bottle of water in the room. If you haven’t heard already, Moscow is THE most expensive city in the world. Our discounted standard room rate could easily have bought us an upgraded suite with breakfast included at the Ritz Carlton back in the states. At 8 am we went to get Helena’s physical, a requirement for her to leave the country. (I don’t know what they do if a child fails to pass, and fortunately we didn’t get to find out.) It was brief, and we did not need to repeat blood tests. The doctor declared her healthy, said she was teething and suggested we purchase a big shotgun to keep the boys away from her. I remarked that we had two older sons to protect her and he responded that they will sometimes be on dates themselves and she will need protection then. We went back to the hotel to rest for our 2 pm appointment at the American Embassy to get Helena’s visa.

I cried as I walked in the Embassy. Everyone spoke English and the lady that briefed all the parents in the adoption area had an American accent and a real Yankee way about her. It was great to see the other adoptive children with their new families. One family had two biological children with them, ages eight and nine, and had just adopted a brother and sister, ages three and four. What an inspiration! They had been together for only three days but behaved very much like a family. Basically our job there was to wait and wait and wait. Each family was interviewed briefly. We were told that there might be a delay and that we might not receive our Visa’s that day, which would delay our trip home. Apparently D.C. was experiencing some difficulty transmitting electronic files and this had caused delays for families over the previous few days. It was great visiting with the other families for the two hours we waited. Helena took (what seemed to us) her first steps alone, no doubt aided by the extra support in her sturdy red butterfly shoes. Of course we thought she was the cutest child there. At four o’clock the Yankee lady came out and announced that the electronic files had not yet come in and that we needed to leave. She hoped they would come in overnight or in the morning, but could not be sure. We were in serious jeopardy of not being approved to come home on Friday due to the requirement that we register with the consulate. It takes two days to register the child at the consulate and the visa must be completed to begin the registration process.

We came back to the hotel and had a wonderful evening playing with Helena. She really is the most marvelous little girl. It’s so fun to watch patterns of interaction develop between us. Mommy (me) is the sleep time nurturer, and she looks to me when she is hurt or disturbed. Daddy is the perpetual playmate. He taught her to cover her mouth after she coughs and say a serious of grunts to mimic “excuse me.” We already see her testing us. She is often grabbing for my earring, and when I say no, she laughs, looks me in the eye and tries again. We’ve developed several pet names for Helena, among them are stinky pants and Linka Lue, which is a derivative of the name “Lenitchka,” a name she was affectionately called at the orphanage. It’s hard to believe this little girl, that is as big as a sack of flour, may one day lead me around by the hand when I am blind, feeble or both. It’s harder still, as interactive and mobile as she is, to comprehend that she spent the first twelve months of her life in an orphanage with a poor ratio of care. It takes nearly 100% of two of us adults to care for her right now. We can hardly believe that 1/7th of a person cared for her up until last Saturday!

12/4/06 Departing for Moscow

On Monday, December 4th, we were scheduled to leave Perm. Often on this journey, it seems we are running on tight deadlines. The passport can be processed on one business day but can potentially take two. The application was turned in on Friday, December 1st, but it was not completed on the same day, despite our coordinator’s best efforts, because four out of five employees were out sick. We were hoping it would come through on Monday so we could leave on a 7 pm flight to Moscow as scheduled. On Monday we spent the day packing and meeting more couples arriving for their second trip. I drew maps for them, got Helena down for a nap and accompanied one couple to my favorite shopping area “children’s world” to make a last minute purchase of decorative barrettes for Helena to wear when she gets older. It’s a lot of pressure to consider what memorabilia might be important to Helena in a decade or two. I also purchased some soviet style hats for the boys.

When I arrived back around 2 pm, Helena was up from her nap and we finalized our packing. Our coordinator picked me up at 3:30 pm to go the passport office while Mike stayed with Helena in the hotel room waiting for our 5:15 pm scheduled departure to the airport. The passport office was up four flights of stairs in an unimpressive, run down building, reminiscent of where I would imagine an illegal office to be located. There were about twenty people waiting in line. Our coordinator whisked me past the crowd and guards, who were cracking jokes and were the least stern faced men I’d seen guarding anything in Russia. We anxiously waited for over an hour for the passport, right up to the deadline of 5 pm, when finally, the passport was completed in the nick of time. Our coordinator whisked me down four flights of stairs to the waiting car and back to the hotel where we met Michael, Helena, and our friend Mark, who was assisting us in bringing our luggage to the lobby.

In the lobby of the hotel, we stuffed Helena in her snowsuit and hat (this is a necessity because Russians will lecture you lest you forget) jumped in the car, and through a dusk-lit, rush hour complete with softly falling snow, drove to the airport with Helena crying most of the way. I found myself tearing up at the prospect of Helena leaving her birth city and what she might envision this moment to be like in the years ahead. I wondered if her crying now reflected some level of sub-conscious angst. I found myself also nostalgic about my time in Perm, and missing what had become my home for three weeks. I knew that it seemed unlikely that we would ever return here, and if and when we did, perhaps on some mission trip fifteen years hence, it would be a far different place than the city I had visited in 2006.

Checking in at the airport went smoothly and then we waited an additional hour before boarding our flight. We noticed a Spanish couple with their newly adopted beautiful, pale, strawberry blonde toddler, and exchanged knowing looks. We didn’t yet realize we would be sharing more time with this family later in the evening. We boarded the plane on time and expected a timely departure. The Spanish couple was seated in the row in back of us and the girl was calm except for the occasional kick in my back.

The plane began to prepare for take-off and circled the terminal. We began feeding Helena finger foods to keep her in place and were ready with a bottle to stuff in her mouth once we’d left the ground, to encourage swallowing to release pressure in her ears. We also gave her a small dose of Benadryl, hoping it would help dry her sinuses and have a sedative effect. After several moments of what we thought was pre-flight ground movement, the plane stopped. Mike looked out the window and remarked that we were back at the exact same place we had started. The mobile staircases moved towards the center and front of the plane. We looked around to see if we could glean any information from the faces of other passengers since any announcements were delivered in Russian. No one spoke English but soon everyone began departing the plane and we followed suit, Mike carrying the luggage, me carrying Helena in the front carrier. It was snowing heavily by now and the terminal was about 200 yards away. Someone motioned for me to get into the front seat of a van and I did, leaving Michael behind to walk. They deposited me at stairwell leading to a different room than the one I’d departed from. I climbed the stairs wondering if I’d ever see Michael again, but I quickly surmised it was their version of a lounge and Michael soon joined me upstairs.

In the lounge, there were several U-shaped couches, a bar, a large TV with a news channel set at full volume and several businessmen. We joined the Spanish couple and settled in to take turns chasing Helena all over the room and prevent her from bumping her head or crawling under the glass coffee tables. It was getting past her bedtime (of 8 o’clock) and she was becoming tired and irritable but the lounge was full of men speaking loudly on cell phones and a loud TV, so it was too stimulating for her to sleep. I carried her around in the carrier and by now she was crying periodically at full throttle. We’d exchanged brief information via sign language with the Spanish couple. Their daughter was eighteen months old. She stood in the same place between her parents the entire time we were in the lounge while her new papa fed her cookies and her mama laid back and rested. We were quite a contrast and I found myself thinking how slim we would be either in the next few years due to chasing Helena or having food grabbed out of our hands by her as we eat, as she is already prone to do.

After about an hour and a half, an announcement was made that we could not understand, but because everyone began to put on their coats and pack up their things, we did as well. We were shuttled to a different plane. Apparently the previous plane was not fit for flight (one of something was not working) and we boarded another plane. Michael later confessed to me (once we’d safely arrived in Moscow) that the plane was thirty to forty years old, which in plane years is an antique, and probably something that would be safer in a museum. I’m glad he waited until later to tell me.

The plane trip was a good dress rehearsal for the flight home to the states, which, one of my friends has noted, is considered the adoption “birth.” Some are easy, some are not, and we were fairly sure by now that Benadryl was acting as a stimulant, not a sedative for Helena. Helena now became 16 pounds of writhing mass, she was not happy about being restricted to four square feet of space. She was tired, she was over stimulated, the lights were on, and she had experienced way too many changes in a few days. It was exhausting for us, but frankly, I felt that she was entitled to express any emotion she felt! She cried and writhed, arching her back and flinging her head backwards which she is prone to do when she is upset. Michael tried to amuse her and she had moments of contentment looking back at the peaceful toddler (of the Spanish couple) behind us, but generally she was just mad. We’d exhausted our supply of food for her and because Mike was sure there would be a meal for us (there wasn’t) we had little with us and were starving. I did manage to locate a small chocolate bar and we split it and stuffed it in our mouths without Helena noticing. (No, we are not giving her chocolate yet, though I am extremely embarrassed to admit she has had a french fry or two.)

After about 30 minutes of the playing, writhing, crying dance, I made a decision to do some tough love and take control of the situation. I held onto her tightly on my lap, tummy to tummy and placed my hand on the back of her head to keep her from arching. She struggled and wailed nonstop for about ten minutes and then finally fell asleep on my shoulder. After a while, I managed to put her down on the seat between us and she slept for about an hour. I found myself wondering what this might be like for inexperienced parents or parents who had reservations about the child they had adopted. We knew that this was transitional; we knew we were committed to her, and this was just a difficult time in the life of our child who we loved.

We finally arrived in Moscow and our coordinator met us and escorted us to our hotel, The Courtyard Marriott. It was now 1 am Perm time, 11 pm Moscow time. We were tired, we were hungry and I’d realized the scratchy throat I’d thought was a reaction to the smoke in the lounge in Perm, was turning into a sore throat accompanying a cold. The coordinator seemed surprised that we were not in better spirits. I guess most couples arrive in the middle of the night after a difficult flight jumping for joy? In the car she explained to us that the embassy physical for Helena in the morning might require an additional blood test (because they may mistrust those performed in region) that would delay our trip by a day. Yippee, I was in an even better mood! Helena was now passed out in Michael’s arms, and fortunately, once we arrived to the hotel, getting her to bed was no problem. Due to my cold and benadryl, I slept great! Mike was still getting accustomed to the time change, and was also concerned about Helena, so he stayed awake listening to her snore.

12/3/06 – Part Two: Just the three of us

I guess that I should pick up where Jill left off. Shortly after she finished drafting her post in Word, I woke up. We talked about the day and listened to Helena sleep. After a bit, I got Jill set up with a movie and headphones while I readied myself for bed. We all slept fairly well, though Jill and I both woke up several times when Helena stirred. I admit to taking a Sonata at about 1:30 AM, but it didn’t really seem to kick in until later. Helena woke up for good at about 7:15, and after a bit of play and getting ready for the day we headed down to breakfast. Helena gobbled up the boiled rice from the buffet, especially after Jill mixed in some mashed up meatball (making it very similar to the types of food she had at the orphanage) and she also enjoyed the yogurt from the buffet. During breakfast one of the Spanish gentlemen that Jill met (who had adopted an older child) came over to see Helena. He was very excited to see her – Jill had spoken of her when they met.

After breakfast we headed back toward our room, but met another US couple in the lobby. They were on their first trip, so we chatted a bit. I was starting to feel really tired (perhaps the Sonata was finally kicking in – maybe it was just my body clock realizing it was about midnight back home). I took Helena up to the room while Jill stayed to talk, then she showed up to take Helena up to a sitting area on the sixth floor she had discovered so I could sleep. Around 11:30 Jill woke me to say that she had just got Helena down for her nap and that she was going to show the couples she had just met around town a bit (yes, I said couples, as Jill had met a second US couple while talking to the first). I reminded her that we were meeting our driver and translator at 2 PM, but said that she should have a good time.

I settled back in to map with her, but of course about 10 minutes later Helena woke up. So for the next two hours we had Daddy time. We crawled around the room a lot, I built towers for her with her stacking cups countless times to watch her smile, crawl over and knock them all down (with a big grin). At one point she slipped while crawling and hit her forehead on the floor – but she let me comfort her, which isn’t always the case with kids raised in orphanages. We had lunch together (I strapped her to the desk chair with my wool scarf as a makeshift highchair). Then we played some more and I introduced her to a couple of Jacob’s and Justin’s favorite shows on Nick – though they were in Russian. At about 1:30 Jill came back from her adventure and we got ready for a trip to pick up some souvenirs with Helen (Lana’s daughter). Helena enjoyed looking at all the brightly colored items in the store, but was getting tired so we headed back for her afternoon nap.

It took a bit of doing, but Jill got Helena to fall asleep once again. We thought we would have a short break, but Helena woke up after about 20 minutes. We think that she has been having quite a bit of gas due the change in her diet, as once we got her to berp she was all smiles. She wasn’t going to have any of that nap business anymore, though, so we settled in to play while we waited for our friend Mark and his stepfather, Vincent (who arrived today to get Mark and Mary’s new son out of the orphanage) to call us for dinner. The two couples Jill had taken out earlier stopped by, and once Helena figured out that they weren’t there to take her away she was all smiles.

After Mark called we got Helena all bundled up again and the five of us departed for dinner. Jill really liked the place next door to the hotel where she had eaten Friday night (and it had been the last place Mark and Mary ate before departing for home last time), but Jill said she thought they had said something Friday about closing for two weeks. It was close by, so we decided to take a chance and see if Jill had misunderstood and it was still open. We walked over, and opened the door (which was unlocked) only to find all the lights out and the place gutted. The hostess we had met there previously was there (in the dark), and said again that they were closed. We decided to move on and headed for the “Living Room”, a little coffee house/café around the corner from the hotel. Food was good, but I got the feeling that they didn’t really want to be a ‘family’ place, as it seemed to be a date spot for young Russian couples. The hostess seemed a bit unfriendly at first, but later offered me a toy for Helena to play with, so it might have been me reading something into the situation that wasn’t there (or it might have been Helena’s charm that won her over). After dinner we returned to the hotel, got Helena ready for bed, and Jill worked her magic once again to get her to sleep. After she was asleep. Jill was feeling a little cooped up in the room, so went down to the restaurant, where she ran into Mark, Vincent, and two other new couples from the states who were here adopting. I stayed in the room with Helena working on these posts until about 11 PM local, at which point I went to bed. Jill came in a short while later and we had an uneventful night. It is now Monday morning, Helena is down for her morning nap (Jill’s magic again), and we are packing up to go to Moscow this evening. We’ll post again from Moscow when we figure out how to get access. This trip it has been very easy to get online as they installed wifi in the hotel this fall – we just login in using the info on the scratch card we bought at the front desk. Take care and thanks for reading all this.

P.S. Be sure to read the post from saturday again, as we've added a picture.

12/3/06 – Part one: The long journey back

It is time for me to once again take some of the blogging responsibilities off Jill’s shoulders. I just posted her impressions of our first day with Helena. I’ll summarize my trip and then fill in from where she left off.

I left Thursday night about 10 PM Eastern from Washington Dulles. I was on a 777, and I had hopes that I would be able to find an empty row to stretch out and sleep, as I knew that the fare I was on was non-upgradeable. Of course that meant that the flight would be completely full, without an empty seat to be found anywhere. I had an aisle seat in Economy Plus, so wasn’t I uncomfortable, but I proved once again that I can’t sleep on airplanes anymore, even when aided with Ambien. At least I had a selection of movies to choose from, and enjoyed the Will Ferrell NASCAR movie (Talladega Nights?) immensely.

I arrived in Frankfurt at about 11 AM local, and promptly made my way to the Red Carpet Club (to which I had access courtesy of the amount I fly for work back home). I made myself comfortable and settled in for my ~7 hour layover to read the English language newspapers they stock and to browse on their snack bar. I even tried to doze a bit, but couldn’t get comfortable enough to do more than nap for about 20 minutes stretched across two chairs. I had just refilled my water bottle for my flight to Perm when they announced that they wanted everyone in the Club to step outside and go through the security checkpoint. Of course when I got there, they immediately asked if I had any liquids. I decided it was time to move on to a Lufthansa club nearer to the gate where my flight would be later in the day. No new English papers here, and crowded enough that I couldn’t stretch out anymore, but I was sitting at the window and enjoyed reading a book I had brought and watching the airport operations outside. Finally at about 3:30 local I decided to check on the status on my flight to Perm. The attendant told me it was on time and pointed out that there was another Lufthansa club across from that gate. I decided to head over there. It was a smaller club, but not crowded. Looking around, I discovered a small room off to one side with three recliners for sleeping! If I had known earlier, I could have headed straight to this club and perhaps caught a bit of rest. At about 5PM local, I headed over to my gate. They bussed us out to our plane (which was way out in the boonies).

Once again the flight was completely full – as were the overhead bins by the time I made it on board. I had a window seat, which helped a little, and settled in to try to sleep once again. I napped a bit, but spent much of the time looking out the window as we passed over Stockholm and Moscow and the way to out first stop, Nizhy Novgorod. We landed there after about three hours flight time, and about half the passengers got off. I noticed that the row across from ours was empty, so promptly grabbed my stuff and took possession. It was nice to be able to stretch out my legs, but with only about an hour and a half of flight time from Nizhy Novgorod to Perm, I didn’t get a chance to try to sleep.

This time around I knew the drill on the ground and got near the front of the line for passport control – but of course then they opened a new line that moved much faster than ours. I knew I was in trouble as I got near the booth, as I recognized the lady as the same one that had a hard time understanding my double entry visa on my departure from Perm. Sure enough, I got up to her, she asked my something in Russian, to which I replied “Ya nye panimayu paRuski” (or “I don’t understand Russian”) and she waved me over to the side. I got a lot of commiserating looks from the Russians in line, and a short time later her supervisor showed up, looked at my passport, said something short and abrupt in Russian, and I was waved back up to the booth, my passport stamped, and sent on my way. Customs went very quick, and Lana was waiting to whisk me through the snow to the hotel. By this time it was about 5AM Saturday local (or about 7PM Friday back home). Jill has covered Saturday from this point on in her post, so I will wrap this up and get started on how our first day with Helena went.

12/2/06 Getting Helena

Today was the big day. Mike arrived back from the states this morning at about 5 am. I’d had a wonderful send off last night shopping and dining with my new friend Kristin (also adopting from the states) and Russian friends, Sveta and Sonya. It’s a long story how we know Sveta and Sonya. They are college students studying English and were a wonderful source of enjoyment as well as practical help navigating a foreign city. It’s been a long time since I met such sensitive, sweet girls who are barely into their 20s.

Anyway, onto today. Mike was very tired and so it was arranged that we would go to the baby home in the afternoon. Mike slept through the morning and I quietly crept out to breakfast and then back to bed for a while. It seemed a bit awkward knowing we were entitled to have Helena, and yet not having her, being afraid of having her and also knowing Mike needed his sleep after a very long international haul. Around 1 pm, we began making the room baby ready and deciding what she would wear. We decided on a simple footed sleeper and the small snowsuit – yes, Mo, the one you bought! We went down to meet our coordinator and driver at 2:30, bearing more gifts for various players in this ballet.

We took our last drive to the baby home, I was actually a bit sad because I have become so accustomed to this routine and also attached to the caregivers. When we arrived, Helena was awake and in the main play area with two of her caregivers. All the other babies were asleep which made it nice to spend time saying goodbye and taking pictures of the caregivers with Helena. However, I also missed saying goodbye to them. I’m glad I took so many pictures and video clips on previous days! A comment was translated that Helena looked so much like Michael and he once again told them that he had not been to Russia previously. I’m not sure they knew that he was denying the possibility that no, it was not possible he was Helena’s biological father. Here we are always saying things that no one understands and no one is the wiser. We then said our final thanks, I hugged the caregivers, did some more crying and we carried Helena to the car. She looked around and was very still as we began the trip and then she drifted off to sleep as we entered the city.

We successfully transferred her to the crib in our hotel room without waking her and I must say I was feeling like a fairly accomplished new mother. She stayed asleep for about 10 minutes while I took it all in and Mike went over to the Aeroflot office to purchase tickets for our trip to Moscow on Monday. The nap ended when I chose to open up my chewable vitamins and the noise startled her. She cried, I picked her up and she was all smiles and ready to play. Mike arrived back soon after and we played for a while and then we decided to go to dinner downstairs in the hotel’s restaurant, mainly because it is close and has a high chair. Helena ate a large jar of baby food, nibbled on bread and drank from a sippy cup and dinner was more successful than I anticipated. I was glad I’d bought a very large bib and also that we’d fed her several times at the orphanage.

We took a trek to the market after dinner and then decided to give her a bath in the shower. I know that makes a lot of sense. I sat in the bottom of the shower and put a small amount of warm water in it and washed her off. She wasn’t too upset by it but it certainly wasn’t a play bath. I can’t wait till we have a bathtub. She has very dry skin, especially her legs and we think it’s because they hose her down after sitting on the potty multiple times a day. So we lubed her up with some baby lotion. Now she is sleeping soundly in the crib and Mike is snoring next to me. She wasn’t much into being held as it seemed to stimulate her. We put her in the crib, turned out the lights and put on some soft music on the laptop. She lay down and fussed a bit but stayed laying down. I only needed to rub her back a bit and and reassure her vocally and she went to sleep after about 15 minutes which I think is a world record for any of my three children to date. I have mixed feelings about wanting to rock her and give her all that safety and reassurance vs. having her be low maintenance at bedtime.

It is now Sunday evening and we haven't yet posted about Saturday. We'll get this up and work on adding Sunday's events to the blog later.

11/28/06 The routine and another baby gets a home

I have been having some internet connection problems so I have not been successful logging on today to post or email. It is Tuesday, November 28th and this may be retroactively posted once I get a connection.

The hotel is quite the happening place and my floor is very social. We have a group of basketball players here and there are a few Americans on the team. Late at night they can be found playing Nintendo in their rooms with their doors open. I have also discovered that the maids sometimes clean unoccupied rooms at 3 am. In addition, there are now several businessmen staying on our floor who meet in a meeting room at the end of the hall. The unlocking of doors at all hours of the day and night can be disruptive. If I didn’t love my room so much (see picture) I would consider moving. I will be moving on Friday to accommodate the two other members of my family who will be joining me Saturday morning.

The social side of things has really picked up. A new gal came into town and we are all enjoying each other. Yesterday, three of us were together from 4pm in the afternoon until after midnight. We hung out on the king size bed in one of our bedrooms, went to dinner and had gris salad, and then came back and hung out some more. We watched adoption video clips on YouTube.com. The gris salad is a greek like salad with feta cheese. The feta cheese is the best we’ve ever had. It’s very smooth and not as salty as what we have in the US. We all swore we would have to order extra on our salads next time (which I think is tonight) if we could figure out how to say it in Russian. (Update - they were out of feta!)

I am establishing quite a routine and am rather enjoying it. I am not minding it being too cold to leave the hotel and find it all rather restful. I get up in the morning without an alarm, each day it gets later and later because of the night antics. Today I woke up and thought, it must be 3:30 am, who is making all that noise, only to discover that it was 8:30. Yesterday I woke after 9 and nearly missed the breakfast buffet. The buffet goes till 10:30 and includes rice, broccoli, some meat, some egg thing (soufflé like), some curds wrapped in pancakes, hard boiled eggs, some cream of rice or oatmeal, meatballs, fresh vegetable salads and apple salad. Bread, juice, tea and coffee is also available. I usually have the hot cereal option, apple salad and a hard boiled egg or bread. I also like the meatballs but they are not often available. They also have yogurt which I take to the room to eat with cereal later.

After breakfast I get ready to go to the orphanage as I have a driver meet me at the hotel at 11:30. It takes about 35 minutes commute time each way and then I am usually there visiting between one and two hours. I arrive back at the hotel around three and then have some down time, eating a snack in the room, checking email, resting or reading unless someone asks me to visit. Then we decide where to have dinner. Lately, it has been so cold that we are appreciating a few places to eat that are close to the hotel.

The orphanage does not disturb me the way it once did. I have discovered one of the little boys in Helena’s group, I met in September, is being adopted by a couple that is staying in another hotel. I met them last week and I believe they are in Moscow with him now. They have FOUR other children between two and eleven! Another child in her group left with a lovely couple from Spain this week. The new gal in town is at my baby home so it is great to see her there visiting another boy from Helena’s group. I do feel better seeing that these children are getting forever families. I am enjoying greeting the caregivers and have even learned how to say “how are you” to each of them. Its sounds like Kag de la! A local told me my accent is pretty good, which somehow isn’t much of a compliment given I can only say about five words.

So while I am tempted to indulge in the idea that you may think I am so brave to be here alone, I can tell you I am not suffering in the least, now that I have found some good community and adjusted to the time difference. I will say that I miss the boys, and I bust into tears every time they send me an email. The picture of them I received yesterday was especially joyful and tearful at the same time. I actually feel a little sad at the idea of leaving Perm. I think there are many things in the city I would enjoy seeing, it’s simply too cold and icy to go further than the market, three blocks away.

I will leave with the mention that this is a very joyful day for my friend, L, who has been trying to have children with her husband for close to a decade. Today her adoption was completed and she picked up her beautiful little boy from the orphanage. I was honored to be the first at the hotel to spend time with him. He is well-nourished and just magnificent. He looks similar in size to Helena but when I picked him up it helped me to remember that most little boys really do have inexplicable, invisible weights in their butts because he felt a lot heavier. He has the capacity to stay in one place for several minutes at a time, which of course I was a little envious of and I know you are rolling your eyes now. He wouldn’t go to sleep for a nap due to his new surroundings, so we decided to take him to the market up the street. He wore the snowsuit I bought at the MOPs sale and promptly fell asleep on her shoulder. I was terrified she (with him) would be run over or slip on the ice, and I was not shy about shielding them, but we made it safely. I haven’t yet discussed the driving techniques used in this country, nor the fact that drivers and people are pretty much constantly skidding around on sheets of ice! Let’s just say coming into contact with cars as a pedestrian or passenger is about the most dangerous aspect of being here!

I don’t think I am quite connecting to the fact that there will be a baby in my room in three days, because when I saw the baby food in L’s room last night, it all seemed so premature and then I thought, oh my gosh, I guess I need to get some baby food in the room!

I hope everyone is well back home. Thanks for reading and das va danya!

11/24/06 Pictures from trip

Pictures in Perm City


















I'm finally uploading some photos and it's easier than I thought. I know this might be a bit of a disappointment, perhaps you were hoping for Helena photos; it won't be long.

Here is the view we had from one of our rooms towards the back (right). Not all that impressive, but very snowy as you can see. The pic. on the left is towards the front of the hotel and shows the arts museum across the street. My newest room, a single, also faces that way, directly at the tower but at a lower level. I think I will post more pics. from now on.

Here is me re-creating the scene from Moscow when I wore the blanket around my neck as a scarf and had other things in my pocket. I didn't actually have Peanut Butter in my pocket, but I did have some make-up on so this look is not very authentic. They don't have PB here, by the way. Actually the getup doesn't look as ridiculous as it felt.

Today, I'm feeling a little sad and lonely. This is really a lot to take on - being here alone. I'm just going to focus on seeing my daughter and getting through one day at a time. It wasn't as hard as I thought seeing her alone and it was the only part of the day I didn't feel on the verge of tears. It was just the two of us, like it's going to be alot of the time at home. I walk in the baby home by myself alot now, I had no translator or coordinator today, just the non-english speaking driver and I. The caretakers know me and it's a relief to no longer feel like I have to convince them I'm adequate to parent her. I sauntered in, and began talking to the babies on the potties. Helena was one of them and they swooped her up and cleaned her up for me. I decided to take her to the small room in the back because there was a new adoptive mom visiting in the main area and Helena gets a bit distracted.

We got to visit in the room with all the exposed pipes and crumbling walls which Helena so enjoys pulling up on. So, we played the game of catch Helena and pull her away from the walls. Gosh, she doesn't rest for a minute. Did God think we needed ANOTHER active child?? The only way I can get her to sit still on my lap and read "Danny the Duck" is if I let her chew on and thrash around the "Baby Penguin" book. Maybe she is bored and has them memorized already. I do know she already motions "more" in sign language. She ended up getting too close to a wall and scraped her face against it before I could reach her. I thought she hit her forehead but her nose started bleeding a little. I was mortified. She did cry but it was pretty short-lived and was not a gusher. I was thinking I should take her to the caregivers and fess up, but I had tissue and took care of it. I did mention the incident (in sign language) when I left, and it didn't seem to be a big deal.

My favorite caregivers were there today and I showed them the pics of our family and friends which they seemed to enjoy. I think they like the idea of Helena having siblings. A lot of you are in them incidently (apparently without your permission) because I have beach pics and pics from my birthday in 05. What a great looking bunch! No names, addresses or vital stats. though so I think you're safe.

I'm in my new room for the rest of the evening. I moved into a single and it's very retro, robin's egg blue wallpaper with rust silk curtains and warm cherry veneer furnishings. It's about as big as a jail cell but very cozy and it has everything I need except a BATHTUB. I'll try to take a picture and post it. At least with Mike home now, I can count on a daily call. Last night, I fell asleep for the first time w/o anything and slept for FIVE full hours. I think I've turned a corner!!!!

Yesterday I found some great shops. I could go crazy buying but then a) we'd have to physically carry it home, b) we'd have to pay an overage fee for weight to get it through Moscow I think and c) with what $? Okay, I did get a few things. The kids shoes here are adorable, very European, more than I'd pay at Marshalls, but less than at Nordstroms for a similar look. They were about $16 for a pair of red shoes with bejeweled butterflies on them and I got them big so they'd fit till spring.

Okay all for now. Sorry, sort of disorganized today, but hey it's my blog. Thanks for reading, it makes me feel a little less lonely. I might gear up for a dvd movie if I don't lose the entire blog before I get re-connected again to the server.

11/23/06 Flying Solo!

Sorry, we have not updated the blog for a while. Michael left this morning at 2:30am to return to the U.S. and a couple of eerie things are happening. I just got up and it is just after 7am (pitch dark outside). I looked around for the breakfast coupons that go with our room. It seems Mike took them with him and they are now in Germany. I’m sure we can work it out but communication is sometimes difficult with the front desk. I do have a lot of food in the room but I was looking forward to meeting some ladies (adopting from another agency) at 9:30. Besides, I am getting used to curds and broccoli for breakfast!

A few minutes ago I decided to power the computer and went down the hall to get hot water for tea. It’s at the other end of the building on the same hallway. As I began to walk back the lights went out. Eerie! I found my door because I had a rough idea where it was and the "do not disturb" tag was on. I’m now sitting here in the dark typing in a word doc for the blog because there are no wireless links coming up. Maybe this has something to do with the power being out. So, I am totally out of communication but safe here right now. It’s snowing out so maybe there is a downed power line or I am experiencing a Russian black out? By the time I post this it will all be fixed and there will be an update, so no worries. I do have a flashlight Mike left and I imagine I could walk down to the other ladies’ room and find them so it is nice that I have community here. They are bunking together and their husbands are gone as well.

As you know, we were approved by court to adopt Helena but did not get the 10 days waived. I know so many of you prayed very hard for us to come home and be re-united with our sons and I am sorry if you feel let down. The law is very strict here in regards to the 10 day waiver, which is often more frequently waived in other regions. We really needed a note from the baby home stating that she was in medical crisis and needed immediate medical attention in the U.S. and although she is alarmingly small for age, she is not in any type of crisis. We also do not know the stature of her birth parents and how that factors in. Mike was requested to do nearly all the talking and he did mention that at the baby home many children are left with one caretaker. We had actually prepared to say that that eleven children (babies) are left with one caretaker (the truth: they are often left in the room without any caretaker) however, we do not know if that would have made any difference. It’s a fine line between mentioning what you’ve observed vs. offending a representative that may have some pride about the “perceived” quality of care of their orphanages. We’ve heard that our baby home will be visited by a government official next week. They (the caretakers) have been painting stairwells and furniture. Furniture has appeared in a hallway where there was none before. As everywhere, perception is not the same as reality. I’m not happy to be here alone but the main advantage is that I do get a lot more bonding time with Helena before we leave the county.

The lights are back on and it appears I have wireless!

It’s been very cold here, roughly near 0 degrees and very icy so we haven’t been outdoors much. Our basic errand besides driving to the baby home and dinner out involves going to the 24 hour market to buy water and sundries. There are very few familiar brands, but I did luck out in finding some instant soup that is quite good, so that will be my new lunch staple.

It’s supposed to warm up (closer to 20 degrees) over the next few days, so the ladies and I intend to get out a little and explore the shops. There is an art museum across the street I’d like to see as well. I am in the process of changing rooms because I don’t need this much space alone and I’d prefer something cozier and less expensive on the same floor as the other ladies. There are some green rooms down there that are quite beautiful, although they are considered “unrenovated.” I rather prefer the character of them over the beige/neutral one I am in now.

Sleep is still a job, I can relax but not pass into sleep without help. As a student of the behavioral scientist, I am curious at to what happens to the neural pathways (responsible for triggering sleep) when they do not fire for a period of time. Do they shrink up and new paths need to be established? Now that Mike is gone, I will try harder to establish a pattern and have no concerns about waking due to snoring or motion in the room. I’m also going to indulge in a little “American Coffee” on the breakfast buffet so that I am actually alert in the morning, that is, if I can get to the breakfast buffet! The warmer weather will also enable me to get out and walk a little.

All for now, will check email!

11/20/06 - She is ours! (but not yet)

Today the Russian judge approved our petition to adopt Helena! The 10 day wait was not waived, so we can't retrieve her from the orphanage until the first of December. Jill and I anxiously await that day. More later, as we need to leave to go see her in a few minutes.

11/19/06 – Tomorrow is the big day

Jill has been making most of the posts – today it is my turn. Tomorrow morning at 11 AM local ( that will be 1 AM on the East Coast) we go before a Russian judge to petition to adopt Helena. We have met with our coordinator and our interpreter twice now to discuss what to expect. The region recently added a third judge to handle adoption cases and we have been assigned to the new judge. Neither our coordinator or our interpreter have worked with families before this judge, and I think they might be even more nervous than we are. The first time we met with them about court they provided an agenda of what to expect. Over the last couple days Jill and I have walked through the different topics ( and questions we have heard other families had been asked) and captured notes on what we would say ( though I have to give credit to Jill, as she did much of the work). Tonight we took our laptop with us when we met with them, and I think they much appreciated the opportunity to help us refine our answers. I’ve spent the last hour or so refining our notes and getting them ready to print at the hotel business center (including formatting for A4 paper rather than US letter size). A minor detail, but as we only have three sheets of paper to print three pages of notes, it might be critical.

Enough about court preparations – time to get on to Helena. Yesterday we arrived at the orphanage at about noon, so she had already had her lunch and was posted on the potty (as is usual practice). We talked with her there for a few minutes, then the caretaker arrived to dress her for us. Jill asked to take over and the caretaker was only too glad to oblige. There was another couple visiting their son in the main play area (more on them later), so we were asked to use the small room Jill has mentioned previously. It was nice and private, but cold (it has been very cold here – temperature this morning was -15 degrees Celsius, or 5 degree Faranheit). After about 20 minutes, Jill went to offer chocolate to the caregivers and check on the other children. She came back saying that the other copule had offered to share the main play area with us. They are from Spain and successfully went to court last Monday. They are waiting out the 10 days and coming to the orphanage everyday to play with their son, Roger (it was Rostom). It turns out that they have two children at home (a daughter age 4 and a son age 2). Roger will turn one early next month, so they will have their hands full when they get home. We showed each other pictures of our families, and when we placed the photo album we use with Helena down in the playpen between Helena and Roger we got to see another side of Helena. She was happily playing with another toy until she noticed that Roger had crawled over and picked up HER album. She quickly threw down the toy she had been playing with, crawled over to Roger, and took HER album out of his hands. It was quite funny to watch, and made us feel good that she valued the album so highly. Later, both she and Roger were in walkers careening around the hallway, and anytime Roger would try to get by Helena, she would move her walker to block, sometimes pretending not to be watching Roger while she did so. After some time in the walker, we fed Helena her afternoon snack and then handed her off to her caregivers. She was able to join the rest of her group in group playtime, so she wasn’t as upset to see us leave as Friday (and I think yesterday’s caregiver (and today’s) is more connected to the children than some of the others).

Now it is on to our sleep odyssey (or lack thereof). Yesterday we moved across the hall to yet another room. It is much quieter than the previous room, and slightly larger. The problem we had last night was with heat. Talking with our interpreter today, it seems that the colder it gets outside the higher they turn up the heat inside, and both Jill and I suffered last night because of this. If we opened the window the room rapidly became too cold, and after we shut it the room quickly heated up too much. Despite being medicated with an Ambien CR, Jill couldn’t sleep and ended up taking one of the individual (twin) comforters they outfit the bed with and the bedspread out into the sitting room area (which was slightly cooler) and sleeping on top of the comforter on the floor. I tried to go without meds, but gave up and took on of Jill’s Sonata’s at about 2 AM – which didn’t seem to do anything. I resigned myself to getting up every hour or so, opening the window for about 5 minutes, then closing it and going back to bed. Even with all that, I think I still got more sleep than Jill did. Jill has had a really hard time sleeping and needs all your prayers. Tonight Jill is in the bedroom and I plan to sleep on the small loveseat, which we figured out how to pull out into a small bed today. With an Ambien CR in me, I hope to get enough sleep to be able to handle court – I just hope Jill does as well.

Back to Helena – today we visited her again at about noon. The Spanish couple was already there, and we immediately asked if they minded sharing the main visitor area. They had no issues, so today Helena and Roger again played near each other (they didn’t interact much, but then they were both busy with their new parents most of the time). Jill tried on the shoes we brought to visit the US embassy in Moscow (which fit) and the snowsuit we brought (which was way too big). I guess I’ll be bringing a smaller snowsuit back with me (unless the 10 days is waived). Today we spent more time holding Helena and walking around the hallways talking to her. She seemed very content. Of course we also got into the physical play she loves, and she spent time in a walker zooming around the hallway. She seems to love the walker, especially when she gets to explore areas of the orphanage she doesn’t see very often. We had to block her several times from entering other rooms or going down a unused side hallway where they store extra cribs, strollers, etc. Our interpreter told us that her snack would be later than usual today, and as Jill and I were both exhausted we decided to leave a bit earlier than usual to give her time to play with her group (and to give us time to rest before the meeting about court I mentioned at the start of this post).

Well, that about catches us up to date. We need all the prayers we can get for tomorrow – first and most importantly that the judge decides to approve our petition to adopt Helena, second that she decides to waive the 10 days, and third that court goes smoothly. Prayers for Jill to get adequate rest are also much needed. We look forward to reading comments left here or to the emails you sends us. Our next post will be tomorrow afternoon (local) after court, so be sure to check here Monday morning (your time).

11/18/06 Attaching and preparing for court

Okay, things were a little more optimistic last message. The night I wrote (Thursday into Friday) was a long night without sleep and the day brought no better. I am now officially in the “I can’t sleep mode” and the crying jags are upon us. Mike was medicated that night, no wonder! I did log a few hours of sleep last night (well, really this night, since it’s 5:45 am) with a double dose of sonata. Mike is snoring away. We are in a different room that has a sitting room outside the bedroom so I am no longer on the toilet (well on the toilet lid) but on a love seat as I type. This room is noisier as it faces the street and there is traffic and bar noise. There has been music playing all night. We immediately noticed this (street noise) at mid-day and asked to move across the hall, but they told us to wait until today, which is fine. We don’t mean to be high-maintenance, but sleep is pretty important.

People are asking about Helena’s size. I held up a 12 month Carter’s outfit to her today and it was 3 inches below her feet AND it’s pre-washed. So she will officially be swimming in the 12 months clothes I brought with me and maybe could wear them for 4th of July at the current rate of growth. It’s all very deceiving, but she is only 26 ¾ inches long. I think my youngest was that size at 16 weeks, no exaggeration. She is plumper than last time, which is a good thing because her brain is getting calories. Bottom line, 6-9 mos. is a safe bet for the next few months. We do have a few sleepers in the size, but not much playwear.

Today I asked if I could get her out of her crib when we went to the orphanage and it was permitted. She was awake and standing in her faded orphanage jammies and so glad to see us. We have a short video clip that we can show soon. I picked her up and took the clothes and diaper from the caretaker to dress her. Unfortunately her diaper was messy and we didn’t have wipes with us. They whisked her from me and took her to the shower to hose her down. I came in to continue dressing her and thankfully her bottom was warm and she was content. I have heard that many orphanages use cold water only and the children are sometimes terrified of baths for many months. Hopefully the warm water is the rule and not an exception due to my presence.

It was great to do ordinary things with her like dress her. It gets exhausting for both of us to be the continual playmate for two hours each day. People are always watching and it feels like a performance. We feel we are not meeting expectations if we just simply hold her or walk with her, which we do anyway because we feel it is right for attachment and right for us. Apparently, children are thought to be independent and grown by age six, so I suspect affection, holding is not a premium here. I haven’t seen any infants in baby carriers on the streets or in the stores, only in strollers.

She was very active today. We did some crawling races together on the small space we were permitted to keep her contained. They feel that children catch diseases from the ground, so we need to restrict her to the blanket, yes, the same one I wore as a scarf in Moscow! We are hoping the boys will enjoy playing with her and teaching her things. She’s quite the mimic, so it should be very satisfying for them. They gave us some nesting blocks and she enjoyed banging them together and was even imitating some of our syncopations. They brought out the high chair and some oatmeal for us to feed her for dinner. She doesn’t eat much when we’re around; she sees us as the playmates and it’s very distracting because we are taking away from her “play time” with us. I suspect they take her aside when we leave and get some more into her so she will sleep through the night. They say she is a good sleeper, Amen! We’ve started offering her the sippy cup with the broth-tea concoction they provide. She’s taking it easily without the valve and it’s a little less messy than the cup, however, she’s likely to fling it around and spray her face if we’re not assisting her. Today we introduced some finger foods; those sweet potato star things that come in a plastic container. She’s never fed herself before, but she was beginning to grasp the concept. She can pick them up in her pincer grip but then smashes them against her face to get them in her mouth. She liked them but unfortunately, through a miscommunication, the caretaker ended up taking them and keeping them. I think they thought they were a gift; our intention in speaking with them was to ask permission to feed them to her. Oh well, Mike can replace them on his trip home. Miscommunications are common here and we are always trying not to offend!

Leaving her was very difficult today. She seems more like ours now and it feels less like we are visiting her and more like she is visiting the orphanage but belongs with us. She was content when she was handed over, but then we saw her on the potty in the alcove and she was crying. When she saw us, she stopped. It was evident on her face she knew we were leaving and she was going to burst into tears the minute we were out of sight. This was very hard for us and tears are streaming down my face as I write. She knows us now, she has expectations, and because of the restrictions we can only meet them two hours a day. I am alarmed at the ratio of care. I have been using the word “they” as a pronoun, but there is only one caretaker with her group of about twelve children, contained in three rooms. There are babies crying in cribs. There are children left in walkers and on potties unattended in rooms and alcoves. The caretakers are spread very thin and the children are part of an assembly line of care and must wait their turn.

Please pray that the10 day wait after court is waived. It is rare but we will plead the case that Helena is five months behind in growth (technically failure to thrive by US standards), anemic and the ratio of care in the orphanage is far from adequate. If she leaves, the others will get more care, it’s that simple. All we can do is ask respectfully. Crying is apparently helpful, and I will have no problem there. The ten days gives the judge the opportunity to revoke his/her decision should they reconsider the testimony. We are hoping the fact that we are already parents and our boys are thriving will be in our favor.

We are enjoying your comments and emails. If we do not respond it is because we keep getting knocked off the server. A few emails I attempted to send got kicked out to who knows where.

We hope everyone is well and thanks for reading.

11/17/06 Settled in to the routine

We've been here three days now. We roughed it and went all day without sleeping in the middle of the day hoping we'd adjusted to the time difference. We went to sleep w/o aid, if you don't count the first 20 minutes of "Flight Plan" starring Jodie Foster. Mike is doing well sleeping tonight. I woke up at 11:45 am thinking it had been all night and it had only been an hour and a half. Don't you hate that! All considering we're doing much better on sleep than last time.

We have wireless in the room now, so it's around 3 am and I'm hiding out in the bathroom doing computer stuff. It's not too bad, I'm sitting in a chair backed against the door. I have a pillow on my lap under the computer and my feet are on the toilet. The room is about 5x5 and the pie shaped shower leaks, so you have to use the very small, thin towels to line the floor. Fortunately, it's hot enough so you don't need to use any towels to dry off. Just kidding! Actually, it's colder than last time indoors. They have a reputation for jacking the heat to about 80 degrees inside (not an exaggeration), so I didn't bring much, thinking we'd be wearing t-shirts inside. Now I'm layering all my shirts to stay warm. Weird how the luggage I decided to skimp on was long johns.

We are enjoying seeing Helena daily. We've added a meddly of songs to our routine (Twinkle Star, Sunshine, Muffin Man) so I am sure the staff is enjoying the performance. Today Helena was sleeping when we arrived. I want so much to get her from her crib myself and see her sleeping. They seem to take great pride in getting her ready for you; they whisk her up and jostle her awake while they quickly stuff her into what they think is more suitable attire. Right, so like I'm going to have someone to get her up and dress her for us when we are home? Re-reading this, I realize I need to appreciate the pride they take in their jobs. They are trying to impress us even though she had us at first glance.

Today, they encouraged us to put her in the walker and get her to be active right away. I was insistent that we HOLD her. She hasn't been held for the sake of just holding probably ever, so if she's a bit sleepy and doesn't mind being held until she's big enough to hold us, so be it! We're very fortunate she can tolerate this degree of contact. Apparently some of these kids are so unfamiliar with physical intimacy, they resist any holding.

Our routine here is very demanding and it's wearing us out. We spend about 3 hours a day doing business and the rest is devoted to sleeping, eating, checking email, deciding where to eat dinner and dvd watching. I've been doing my advanced pilates ring dvd, Mike passes on that and substitutes an activity entitled eating Toblerone. We've also done some some bible study related to the booklet we got at church recently. Please let us know if you have some prayer concerns (I'm being serious now). It's hard to fit it all in, but we somehow we manage (not serious now). Oh, and we took a walk down to the river and to the grocery today.

The other couple we know just arrived. I managed to pass a msg. to them stateside at the last minute to bring me pimento cheese in a jar and the husband relayed to me that he went to four stores looking for it before having success. I was impressed, but really it wasn't that necessary. He told me he finally asked someone at Trader Joe's and pleaded, stating "you don't understand, I'm taking this to a woman in Russia and I need this today." Now if only I could find some crackers other than Wasa crispbread as my wheat thins are running low! So that's why all the women are a size negative 2, few processed snack foods. We get stares here because we are obese by EE standards!

We enjoyed dinner with this lovely jet-lagged couple tonight and the wife got to be Michael in terms of not getting fed until everyone else ate. Mike was quite happy to NOT be the last to eat. I'm sure it will all turn around soon, as ordering a main course practically guarantees you will not eat for an hour or two but it is good to work up an appetite watching others eat.

Today it snowed and was like a White Christmas movie. It looks a lot less oppressive with all the bright snow around. We are working on getting the seatbelts from behind the seat so that we can use them. We saw two accidents on the way home from the orphanage and I think it might be worth offending the driver to protect our lives. BTW - people DO NOT wear seatbelts here, some of the cars do not even have them. They seem to take precipitation very much in stride. It looks like there is about 4 inches accumulation now and fortunately we do not go out till later this afternoon. It's a good thing, because our schedule is packed. If I can fit it in, I'll take a picture and post it along with the one of me wearing a blanket as a scarf.

I can't wait to post a picture of the baby. Maybe right before we leave the country. I'll give you a description now. She's just over 16lbs, big tummy, dark blonde hair that I think has a little curl up at the end as it's a bit longer and coming away from her head. Her eye are blue, she's very pale (low iron, sunshine). She has a brow like Mike and hairline like Mike. I kept thinking she looked like someone I knew. I finally figured it out; she's a ringer for Ekaterina Gordeeva, the skater. I've been a fan of her for 2 decades and saw her in Pentagon City with her now late husband in 1994. Some of the documentaries, biographies about her life feature pics of her as a child and that's what I see in Helena. I'm curious to see if others see it too.

Well, I think I'm going to go hit the coveted Pimento cheese and Wasa crackers and watch Mike sleep while I gear up for the breakfast buffet at 7! If I'm bold I'll wake Mike up to join me to watch the rest of "Flight Plan." I'm sure he'll appreciate that.

Hope you all are well. We appreciate the emails and the comments! Cheryl- send me an email so I can email you!
Jill

11/15/06 We’re back in Russia!

Sorry we have not posted yet. I actually wrote up a lengthy post last night but all the controls on the blogger browser were in Spanish and then when I was finished and went to upload the post, I must have hit cancel instead of post to site. I was defeated and went to bed, although not to sleep.

Our trip here was uneventful and we are safe, and as usual sleeping at the wrong times. We had an 8 hour layover in Moscow and were taken to the agency’s office for a rest. Mike slept on the floor of the coordinator’s office while I listened to him snore. Men and babies, they can sleep anywhere! We were taken back to the airport to catch a 1:15 am plane to our region. There is a weight limit on these old Aeroflot planes, and you pay a penalty charge for overages. You can only have 20 total kilos per person and we had over 60 total. I decided to save a little and took a heavy sweater from my suitcase to wear under my coat. We also wore our cameras in our pockets and I accordian folded a burgundy fleece blanket into a scarf and put it around my neck. Mike thought that was a little over the top and it looked ridiculous but I didn’t have anyone to impress. I think we were able to cut our weight by 3 kilos. We arrived in Perm about 5 am in the morning. There is snow on the ground in both Moscow and Perm.

Yesterday we were re-united with little Helena. She did not know that today was a special day for her. She did not know that on this day she woke up to meet her parents that would always strive to be there for her most every day of her next 17 years. She did not know that this day was her first birthday. She did not know that this day represented a fork in the road where she would have a chance to be part of a family, to have her own belongings, and unconditional love by so many. She still doesn’t know that the people who come and play with her each day have anything to do with a new future. We can only hope and pray it goes smoothly for her. She really is very happy, I’ll admit it is a little sad to take her from the only home she has ever known.

Helena did not really look too different, as we thought she might, until she opened up her mouth. She smiles a lot more and she has no hesitation in showing us the 4 big teeth (two upper and two lower) she has grown during the last two months. It’s a little startling. I am sad to have missed seeing them come in. She is still quite petite, but seems all legs. I still can’t fathom how her legs can seem so long and she is not even 27 inches in length. She has put on just over a pound but seems to be staying on her own curve on the growth chart. Her head is a centimeter bigger which is really good! She acts differently, more mature. She is much more confident in her gross motor skills, crawls well, her feet and legs are straighter when she cruises. She will probably walk in another month. I can’t get over how much she smiles, she even laughs a bit and I think it will be more forthcoming as she gets to know us better. There are a lot of children in her group, I see maybe one to two caregivers to about fifteen children. It’s difficult to fathom how Helena is so personable and good at eye contact given the improbability of one on one attention. We wished we’d thought to bring bubbles for the children to celebrate her birthday; they don’t permit you to bring in food but we did have a party had which we all took turns wearing.

We stayed at the orphanage for about two hours and then came back to the hotel to rest briefly. That was Tuesday afternoon here. We decided to dine at a café adjacent to the hotel because the hotel restaurant no longer has English menus, very weird considering that other written material is in English and they have a lot of international guests. We are under the presumption that Russians get better service. Eating here is very leisurely, which is nice when you are social, but not great when you are plain hungry. We have a joke going that they do not want to feed Michael. On our last trip we dined in the hotel’s dining room one night and while one course came for me (a salad), none arrived for Michael. After over an hour we decided to go our room and asked that the food be delivered there. My second course came (a hot appetizer), but still nothing for Mike. He had to go up and complain and after about two hours he finally had something to eat. At the café on Tuesday, my salad came and then my soup. Still nothing specific for Mike arrived although we did have some bread. After we had been there for nearly an hour and fifteen minutes his main course (pork medallions) came. I think they are very strict about serving appetizers then main course, and although the appetizers are my main course, Mike has to wait through them to be fed.

Today we returned to the orphanage to see Helena again. She has a bit of a cold. There is a rattle when she coughs but it doesn’t impact her interaction. She seems to have plenty of energy and we launched into our routine of playing with the toys we brought. She’s quite aware of her power and likes throwing toys while we go and fetch them for her. Mike taught her this, way to go Mike! We also go through a little picture book of her home and brothers. She actually pointed to the boys when we said each of their names today, I’m sure it was just a fluke. We play games with her, peek a boo, how big is baby and she seems to roam from one to the next initiating the next game with gestures. We are also bouncing her on our legs and bending her backwards, she really likes this one and will throw her head back in anticipation. We were able to spend time in a more private room today so it was very intimate. But… there were exposed pipes low to the floor and dust everywhere. The pipes were clogged up with wood chunks in a few places… interesting. We can’t wait to get her out away from all the carcinogens. The visiting crib has been painted and you can see where the paint has rubbed off. We just hope it’s not lead-based. We’re trying to create some routines that connect her to us; if anyone has any attachment advice please let us know. I’m embarrassed to admit I left my book at home.

We’re still waiting to dine with the two couples we met in September (with another agency). They have some pre-court preparations to do tonight. Their court dates are later this week. A couple from our agency arrive tomorrow, so we are looking forward to seeing them. I asked them to bring me some pimento cheese in a jar. You can get groceries here, but it’s hard to know what you are getting, so I brought a lot with me, hence the weight. We’ve got peanut butter (not avail. here) some cereal, Kashi bars, lots of tuna fish packs with crackers, raw almonds and tea.

Well, it’s 7 pm here now and I’m sure you’re getting bored with the level of detail, if you are even still reading. After sleeping all afternoon, we’re up for a night of not sleeping (well, Mike might sleep), so I will be sneaking in and out of the room to the computer center. We are about to figure out how to get wireless in our room, that is an improvement over last time. It is really very comfortable here, if only we were awake at the right times it would be great! Send us an email and we’ll respond, we don’t have access to our online address books at home but will write down the email when we get it.

Love and blessings to you all.

Jill and Mike

10/26/06 We're going to get her!

Yesterday was one of those days just like the referral day back in August. I was spinning with anxiety, checking the int'l adoption boards, re-checking the Russian embassy site for news. Recent developments, like the fact that our agency does not have NGO status, were making me concerned that our adoption would halt. The deadline passed October 18th and though our agency had submitted paperwork by the deadline, they did not yet have approval. No one knew how this would impact the process and apparently we were the guinea pig for our agency since we were next in line to get a court date after the deadline.

Around 2 p.m., I got THE CALL! We have a court date for November 20th. We need to be there at least five days prior, so as hoped we will be spending most of November and some of early December in Russia. We may even be there on her birthday, November 14th! The Russian court assigns something called a ten day wait after court, which requires you to stay in the region after the adoption becomes official. In some regions, the ten day wait is waived. In our region it is hardly ever waived. So, we are preparing to hunker down in region for a while. We are unclear at this point if we will both stay the whole time or send for friends as reinforcements. Any takers for a four week siesta near Siberia? Luckily it will be very cold, tourist season is over, and the airfare is very reasonable.

During the last several weeks I was cleaning out closets, de-cluttering, collecting some baby stuff at consignments but feeling "cautious" lest she not be a baby by the time we get her. Now I can relax, but I'm thinking of all the other things I could have done, like learn to speak fluent Russian. (I did learn how to say excuse me this week). Somehow, many of us seem to work harder under a deadline. I am going to try to finish my 2nd son's quilt even though I leave in less than three weeks. I'm figuring I'll never have time after she comes!

10/6/06 What we are doing now?

It has been a while since we have posted. We've been home from trip 1 for three weeks now. We think about the baby and what she is doing and are just glad that we do not hear she is sick.

People are always asking when we will be going back. It is wonderful how supportive people are and how anxious they are for us to bring her home to join our family. Unfortunately, a lot of what goes on to schedule a court date is out of our hands. We have recently found that our region is one of the most paper intensive and it seems that the documentation required is a constantly changing/moving target. One of the first things we needed to get was a clearance from our state capital's social service dept. clearing of us of child abuse conviction. Unfortunately, this form often takes four weeks to get back, which it did. We just received it today and immediately fedexed it to back to Richmond to be apostilled. Every document we produce must be produced in triplicate and then must be notarized and receive the state's authentication that it is a valid document - this is what the apostille seal is.

We have been gathering documents from our doctors, our children's doctors and from financial institutions. The difficulty is that Russia often wants documentation to be presented differently than the way businesses present data in the U.S. Russia wants all data confirmed in a personal letter and businesses are not set up to do this or are not comfortable with the wording that translates confidence to Russia. It is very frustrating and I have sometimes had to go to businesses multiple times to produce the same document again, and this often means bringing a notary with me.

So... while we do not know when we are going back yet, we have submitted a stack of papers to be apostilled and hopefully they will be on their way to Russia in less than two weeks. As more time drags on it does become worrisome because our agency is up for re-accredittation at the end of January and for no real reason the accredittation could be delayed and prevent us from re-entering the region to finalize the adoption.

Despite some uncertainty, I have permitted myself a little down time to do some things to prepare for the baby's arrival. We bought an unfinished chest for her bedroom and we are in the process of sealing it. I've edited some photos of our sons and hung them above her crib. I thought that waking up to scenes of her brothers playing at the beach would be a nice way to start the day and help with her attachment to them. I've been putting together a lot of my boys clothing to consign at a consignment sale next week in hopes of raising some funds for the orphanage.

We appreciate the ourpouring of support for our journey and the enthusiasm for our daughter to be, but it is difficult to forget those that will be left in the orphanage. If you have a passion for these kids and would like to assist us, please let us know. Even a few dollars goes along way over there and can purchase diapers, medicine, or a new walker. So many of their toys and equipment are outdated, even unsafe.

We thank you again for your prayers, please pray we get a court date in November. She is getting older and turns 1 on November 14th. We'd love to be there then.

9/19/06 Transitioning w/Difficulty

We haven't posted because we've had such a difficult time adjusting. I ended up with what they call International traveller's stomach and then ended up having a reaction to the meds to treat it. So much for catching up on sleep. Next time I'll be more careful about eating fresh vegetables but I also think it is a reaction to stress. Each time I think of our daughter to be left in the orphanage, it's like a knife twisting in my stomach. Mike had an abrasion on his eye he needed checking out. It required the consult of a specialist the same day, so within three days there were a total of four drs. visits. So... we've been keeping a low profile.

Yesterday, we completed the formal petition to adopt and sent it to Richmond. The most cumbersome part of that process was selecting a name. Mike had to fly out yesterday in CA, so I had two copies printed with two different names on it and as we flew in the bank to have the petition notarized moments before he needed to be at the airport, it was pretty much eeny, meeny, miny, mo. I'm still not confident about what I chose, but there are more important things about having a daughter, right?

Next time we'll remember to book care for our kids for an additional week so we can recover when we get back, except there will be THREE!!!!!!!! Thanks to all those who helped out this week, and are continuing to help, we really appreciate the prayers, emotional support and just good old fashioned care for our boys.

We are home safely!

I was just looking at the comments - they are very highly appreciated. Mike suggested that I mention that we are home, we are exhausted and to not call us tonight. After about four hours sleep we got up at 2:20 am to leave Perm and travel back home via Frankfurt. Total travel time: approx. 18 hours. We'll tell you all more tomorrow when we are rested and hopefully post some pics to a snapfish account.

9/13/06 Last post in country

I expect this will be our last post in country. I was called away to speak to someone back home so left abrubtly. Communication is difficult. We get internet in a business center in the hotel and sometimes cannot get access. It took us a few days to figure it out. We can't call out, have arranged for our family at home to call us once a day at 6am.

Today we are glad this is our last day. Sleep has been the biggest challenge. We started out with a disadvantage because we left at night (Thursday) and were already awake over 30 hours when we arrived here. We were going on 44 hours by the time night came on Saturday. As some of you know, I can barely sleep in my own bed, so I have been quite the wreck. Michael isn't doing much better though I've heard him snore some. I finally had to tell him to stop saying, "I'm so tired" because it was getting on my nerves. We are strung out on sleep aids and still only sleeping about 4-5 hrs. a night and can't nap AT ALL. We wake at 4 am as do the other couples here that are here for the same reason. We have had a wonderful time socializing with them (10+) and have joked about having group therapy at 4am in the lobby. It's really like summer camp for PAPs. (prospective ____ ____) I am prone to crying jags and our host keeps saying don't cry. In fact, today I'm going to cry all day with no shame at all! I am afraid she thinks it's because of something undesirable about the baby, and of course nothing could be further from the truth! Hopefully somebody will just knock us out when we get home and we will sleep through the weekend.

Did we say we have tickets to the ballet tonight - a whole other story!

Of course our biggest sadness is to leave peanut. Our host promised me she would visit and hold her and of course I cried (again). I mourn for her to go back to the world of minimal interaction with faces. The caretakers work so hard but it is all they can do to meet the basic needs 24/7. Please pray that we can expedite all the remaining paperwork required so that we can get a date for court (2nd trip) as quickly as possible.

We would love to show you photos here but we hope you will understand it may cause some problems for us until things are finalized. We will certainly use other methods to share once we are home! All we can say is that she is adorable and a great fit for our family in every way - except that she is as active as son #2 part.

Please tell anyone you know who is in this process home or abroad to stay with the course. The children need homes and it is such an honor to personally be a part of this. We know the process is grueling in multiple ways but so fulfilling and worthwhile in the end. Pray, pray, pray that the other babies we saw get homes too -- soon. I am making a point of speaking to them while they sit on their chamber pots (potty training for babies because they don't have diapers).

I am glad you are enjoying the blog and we will talk to you all soon! Thank you for your prayers and your comments. We love reading them!

9/13/06 We've accepted referral!

We have been smiled upon by God and really blessed by this trip. There really was no doubt when we met this little girl, who I will call ¨peanut¨ that she was coming home with us. It was pretty much the defining moment when they told me she danced to music. They ran and got the tape player and indeed she dances to music, swaying back and forth as she holds onto the side of the playpen with one hand. I started crying.

An independent doctor evaluated her on Monday to inform us of her current status and she really looks great. Recent tests showed her not to be at risk for some serious conditions that were originally a concern and she is measuring bigger than was stated on the medicals we received initially, especially in terms of her head circumference. We joke that it has grown 2 cm larger since we arrived. She is now easily on the chart in terms of head circumference, an extremely good thing.

She is interacting with us very well. I don´t remember what I said in the previous post, but at first she seemed more interested in her toys than our faces. Within days, this was reversed. She responds as though she recognizes us when we come and is more dependent on us for physical comfort. She also has come down with a little cold, as have all the babies in her group, so we are really enjoy some cuddling time with her. Poor peanut was just getting the cold when the dr. examined her and it was frustrating to see her prompted to perform all her tricks, crawling, cruising, when she really just wanted to plant her head down in the big playpen and rest. She did an excellent job vocalizing for her. Apparently, the Russian babytalk is the key, an area where we are profoundly lacking! Oddly enough, she is not delayed at all, fine motor, gross motor, speech. She is now 15.2 lbs. I find it odd given the circumstances as the orphanage is not a good place for these children to thrive. They are so resilient. The ¨leap of faith¨aspect of this is so amazing. There are maybe ten babies in her group and if I was assigned another child, I am sure I would have found myself thinking about her. Hard to know.

I have to go now. post more later.

9/10/06 - We've met her!

Note - we typed what follows on Sunday, but couldn't get it uploaded onto the hotel computer and then to this blog until today:

There is no other way to describe this experience than surreal. In the last 3 days we flew 1/3 the way around the world. We've logged about 8 hours sleep total. We've spent an afternoon in the beautiful European city of Frankfurt where we took a day hotel room to primarily store our luggage because we couldn't sleep. We've flown into the eerie, foggy night of the former Soviet Union, wondering what lay ahead of us as we huddled together on the empty plane, prayed and gazed out at the little lights that dotted the towns far below. We've looked at each other and said, how did we get here, what are we doing, what if, what if, what if? We anticipated having a day and a half to recover from our trip before "show time" Monday morning. Our host had other plans and surprises in store and shared them with us as we left the airport in the pre- morning dawn.

Within three hours of arriving, we are escorted along country roads to an orphanage. We expect to meet with the orphanage doctor first. When we arrive, we walk through concrete covered hallways that are eerily devoid of sound and enter a reception area. Without warning, our host disappears for a moment and returns with a precious baby girl with delicate porcelain features and blue eyes. We are so tired, we can barely register what is happening; it is difficult to recall even now. We fumble and somehow manage to do what comes naturally when presented with such a gift. Michael holds her first; she does not object. She is sleepy at first and lays her head on his shoulder. Not realizing she is just awake from a nap, I wonder if this is the same active child we saw in the video. We are motioned to go to the doctor's office to hear about her medical information. The child goes with us and our host holds her while we sit in front of his desk. We try to display respect and seriously consider the information the doctor provides, but are distracted by the less than serious reactions of the baby, who is responding to the attention of our host. She is now standing and becoming more engaged by the moment.

After the discussion with the doctor, we spend an hour with this little girl. She is nearly 10 months old. She sits up, she crawls, she pulls up and cruises. She loves a butterfly toy that another family brought for the babies and looks for it when it disappears from sight. We feed her in a high chair and I say, with all honesty and no exaggeration, that she eats more at one sitting than either of our children. She consumes an ample bowl (about 1 cup) of cabbage, meat and potatoes mashed together, all while looking for one of us to pop up over the tray of her high chair. She drinks broth from a cup. She is very alert and responsive to sound or activity. She is really into the butterfly - did I say that already - but will not hesitate to respond to us when she is reminded we are there. Understandably she is not used to so much attention. We initiate some games and she catches on to the fact that she will be kissed on the side of the head if she pursues us with her walker. She is animated but quiet, but finally we get her to make some sound as she face plants into Michael's open palms. We are pretty taken with her; she is quite a peach. Our independent doctor arrives on Monday and will give her a thorough physical evaluation and we will tell us we need to know, although I think we already know...
Our hotel is comfortable. We go to a business center to access a computer and the internet on a card purchased from the front desk. We've met two other couples here for the same purpose. It's very enjoyable to spend time with them and hear about their young son, who is in the same baby home. We eat dinner with one couple at another's hotel's restaurant on Saturday night. The food is phenomenal and reasonable. Mike has beef stroganoff with potatoes. I have green salad with goat cheese croutons and baked potatoes stuffed with cheese and vegetables. Even with bottled soda, the bill is less than $25 U.S. Our hotel has a breakfast buffet that is traditionally Russian; cabbage, salad-like items, some pancakes wrapped around jam or curds and yogurt. I wish we brought more food with us like some peanut butter and our cereal but are managing to snack on some things mid-day.

Our main challenge is sleep. We went to bed last night at 10 and woke up before 3. It's 6 now as I'm writing and we will see the baby again at 3. I guess we will continue to nap here and there. I'm going to sign off now and will share more in a day or two.